so this is the new year [01.01.10]

and I have no resolutions.

I have very mixed emotions about this new year.

I feel like we rung it in with questionable style, our style, which basically just means having a good time in the only way we know how. It's the only way I'd have it; Unpredictable, not too eventful, full to the brim of dizzy laughs, mild nostalgia and anticipation for the year ahead.

I always feel like it should be more significant than it is. A big deal is inevitably made, the pressures there to make plans and be wasted and publish the conclusive proof for all to see.

I guess it's 'cause it's so close to christmas and everything, it tends to creep up on you. I could've sworn we were muddling through mid november days ago, it does not feel like january.

The consequence of that being that I haven't made new years resolutions since I reached the age when they actually could potentially matter.

This year I'm going to make some. Upon thinking about it, a lot of the things I was thinking of are more "wishes" than resolutions, so I won't list them.

• see family more than I do now. carry out more spontaneous visits (gotta love that contradictory sounding sentence).
• watch classic films "everyone should've seen".
• read more. I need to create a solid target for this one so it's actually achievable, but I'm not sure how yet... maybe just "read every day"?
• don't lose anything of significant sentimental or monetary value.
• bring the total of songs I've written to 50.
• tell people I love them.
• stop whinging about everyone hating me and just be satisfied that I have great people around.
• experience some sense of direction. explore potential career paths.
• take less painkillers than currently.
• if any of these bands play in the uk (which most of them won't because of recent tours, but oh well) see them, no fail; death cab, the shins, florence and the machine, tegan and sara, passion pit, bon iver, city and colour, bright eyes, metric.
• lose weight.
• learn to cook healthy things. cook them often.
• get my hair cut on a regular basis.
• do not cut my own hair/allow anyone who is not a qualified hairdresser with qualified scissors cut my hair.
• do not neglect my hamster marmaduke.
• sell a photograph.
• go to reading again.
• make travelling happen asap.
• write guitar parts I love, not like.
• get glasses.
• visit uni people.
• work out the things I need to work out, and don't let them make me feel worthless (I suppose that makes no sense to anyone but me... I suppose that doesn't matter?)
• get the most out of religion.
• be honest, at some point, with someone.
• learn to relax on the phone. call people.
• do not get fired.
• make being on time the norm, and being late the... ab-norm?!
• stop crying all the time for no reason, because it makes me feel mad.
• develop some pictures myself, i.e. use the whole set of darkroom equipment I bought off ebay.
• put everything I can into the band.
• don't get road rage.

I think that'll probably do, won't it?!