And Theres Not A Lot For You To Give If Youre Giving In
Hmm. So the month of december is upon us? Well that all went a little insanely quickly. So when new years day is minty fresh in your mind, and yet you find yourself at the closing of another 364-and-a-half days when everything still has that element of stasis about it... well, I'm not sure how to feel about it, personally. I think Ill miss the static though, so maybe Im not moaning about it.
Things are nice, though. Watching all these interviews from this screen, and seeing people ignite stages all over the damn place, has an element of comfort. The words finally are catching on, I think, and its cementing things I was just speaking impulsively before. Things that needed a little more conviction. So now theres literally, completely and untterly no shred of doubt in my mind that the only thing Ive ever loved or had a passion for is not something I cant exactly 'lose' so to speak. The only thing Ill ever be able to put my heart into is the thing Im putting everything into from this point forward. I think that knowledge specifically makes everything else a little more crystal-clear, a bit more easy and obvious. In the words of Cartel, presumably in response to a different situation 'If I Fail Well Then I Fail, But At Least I Gave [It] Something'. Its all kind of hit or miss, but Im pushing for this and it gets outdated and sour and desperate, its not like I have to give it up. I couldve realised that sooner I guess. Right now Im just so excited to spent all the time I have getting better at this, and trying everything.
Music is the one and only constant at the moment, and somehow, the more I push everything else away, the more truth there is to that.
In essence, its weird times!
